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Fake it ‘til you make it – How to build social confidence

by The Pipon 19 August 2016in PipCorporate, PipLife

The workplace is filled with situations in which negotiating complex social interactions is just as important as work itself. Be it dealing with a difficult colleague or attending a social event social interaction at work can be stressful. Social confidence is something that many people struggle with so we’ve prepared 4 tips to help you boost it:

Fake it ‘til you make it. Faking it works. If you don’t feel confident you can trick yourself into believing you are by adopting a power pose (see our blog on posture). Stand up tall with your shoulders back and stretch your arms behind your head. This power pose releases testosterone and reduces stress hormones making you feel confident and relaxed [1].
Question your assumptions. Does you find yourself analysing what someone thinks of you as you talk to them? People who are social anxious are more likely to attend to and remember the negative aspects of an interaction [2]. “Did he just yawn because I’m boring?” If you find yourself thinking this type of thing after an interaction don’t let it slip by. Instead, ask yourself if that was the only reason. Could your colleague have yawned because he was tired? Don’t let your anxious self believe the assumptions it makes. Find the evidence for it and, if it’s not watertight, challenge it.
Make the first move. Social confidence is a skill to be practiced like any other. If you are interested in getting to know someone better ask them for a coffee. We’re not talking about romantic interests, although it could apply, but maybe a colleague you want to get to know better. Being the person to suggest something social can be scary but it will give your confidence a boost if you do. They may not be able to go but if that’s the case don’t feel rejected (see point 2!). They will most likely feel flattered that you asked.
Be interested in others. There’s nothing worse than a social interaction in which both parties want to engage but one leaves the other to ask all of the questions. Interacting this way comes across as rude as disengaged. When you talk to people ask them open questions about themselves or their opinions to show that you are interested in them. If you seem interested and open with other people they will more likely remember your interaction with pleasure and seek you out again in future.

It is up to you to judge what is appropriate in a social interaction but if you find your lack of social confidence is holding you back start with our tips and, remember, no-one is as confident as they seem on the outside.

1. Carney, D.R., A.J. Cuddy, and A.J. Yap, Power posing brief nonverbal displays affect neuroendocrine levels and risk tolerance. Psychological Science, 2010. 21(10): p. 1363-1368.
2. Amin, N., E.B. Foa, and M.E. Coles, Negative interpretation bias in social phobia. Behaviour research and therapy, 1998. 36(10): p. 945-957.

Friendships in the workplace benefits everyone

by The Pipon 14 July 2016in Mental Fitness, PipCorporate

Do you have a best friend at work? It’s a question that caused controversy when initially included in a Gallup poll on workplace productivity. Many people felt that the concept of a ‘best friend’ was at odds with their concept of work. But the question has been included in a list of 12 key dimensions that describe a great workforce [1]. Why? Because friends work better together than acquaintances.

Groups of friends are more productive and have better decision making abilities than acquaintances when working together. Friends are more cooperative, give more positive feedbackand are more committed to the task at hand [2]. Friendship in the workplace may also help to reduce stress. The more social support people feel when faced with a stressful challenge, the less likely they are to feel stressed. Importantly, social support from colleagues is more important for reducing workplace stress-related exhaustion than social support from external friends and family [3]. This may be because colleagues can offer practical support in dealing with a stressful workload that family and friends cannot.

Although the benefits of friendship in work are plenty many of us may still feel that the concept of a best friend does not fit with our experience. We may have friends in work but not best friends. The difference may not necessarily matter. Other studies show that having a workplace that merely provides opportunities for friendship with work colleagues improves job satisfaction, commitment to the organization and reduces staff turnover [4]. This is an important note for managers and anyone involved in organising workplace structures. Creating opportunities for friendship between work colleagues is something that is worth putting time into. People are by nature sociable creatures and merely creating physical spaces where people can gather at break times can help to nurture friendships in the workplace. Some companies create online environments where colleagues can chat informally and many organise outings or breaks to build social support. Even introducing a personal element into the workplace, such as celebrating staff birthdays and other milestones, can foster a sense of belonging and engagement. There are many ways, big and small, to help build friendships in work but the payoffs, a happier more productive workforce, will far outweigh the effort.

1. http://goo.gl/UXMOud.
2. Jehn, K.A. and P.P. Shah, Interpersonal relationships and task performance: An examination of mediation processes in friendship and acquaintance groups. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 1997. 72(4): p. 775.
3. Halbesleben, J.R., Sources of social support and burnout: a meta-analytic test of the conservation of resources model. Journal of applied Psychology, 2006. 91(5): p. 1134.
4. Riordan, C.M. and R.W. Griffeth, The opportunity for friendship in the workplace: An underexplored construct. Journal of business and psychology, 1995. 10(2): p. 141-154.

Banish the pesky 3pm slump with exercising

by The Pipon 28 June 2016in PipCorporate

The 3pm slump can be the bane of workplace existence. It is a time when eyes glaze over and motivation sinks. In fact, some suggest that the best time for social media strategists to post to Twitter and Facebook is at 3pm on a weekday because so many people log on at this time. The 3pm slump is not a pleasant feeling and nor is it helpful for workplaces. So are there ways to reduce it? Yes and one solution may be exercise.

A research study looked at three workplaces that provided on-site exercise facilities. They asked workers about their mood and energy in the morning and in the afternoon on days they exercised and on days they didn’t [1]. On exercise days employees had better mood in the afternoon, less fatigue and felt better at time management. They reported that exercising during the day gave them a sense of perspective on work leaving them better able to cope with stress and giving them a sense of personal achievement. Other studies have found that short bouts of exercise not only boost mood but also improve memory performance and other cognitive abilities [2].

Yet workers also reported some downsides to daytime exercise including a sense of guilt about leaving work and worries that colleagues would judge them negatively for doing so [1]. It is possible that many of the employees who weren’t exercising during the day felt the same way and that this was one thing stopping them from taking it up.

So what can be done? Providing on-site facilities may not be possible for many workplaces but changing the workplace culture can be. If exercise during the day becomes a norm employees may be more likely to take advantage of the benefits it offers. There is a fine line between encouragement and pressure, however.

Many people may not wish to exercise for other reasons but, as our blog last month showed, even a short walk or similar non-strenuous activity outside can help to boost mood, mental ability and decrease stress (link to post) thereby banishing, or at least reducing, the 3pm slump.

1. Dugdill, L., et al., Exercising at work and self-reported work performance. International Journal of Workplace Health Management, 2008. 1(3): p. 176-197.
2. Hogan, C.L., J. Mata, and L.L. Carstensen, Exercise holds immediate benefits for affect and cognition in younger and older adults. Psychology and aging, 2013. 28(2): p. 587.

blog-title-stress-yellow-cloud-lightning

Lets talk about stress in the workplace

by The Pipon 14 June 2016in PipCorporate

“A problem shared is a problem halved” is a saying we have all heard but is there any truth in it when it comes to workplace stress? When people are stressed out by work they often have a tendency to focus purely on the stress and to isolate themselves from colleagues by ignoring breaks and social occasions. Yet often when people are overly stressed the amount of time spent ‘working’ is actually time spent procrastinating, worrying about the to-do list and just feeling stressed.

We are bombarded with messages that stress is bad but stress can be good or bad depending on how you frame it. Chronic, uncontrollable stress is not good but short bursts of stress can sharpen our thinking and give us the tools to address future challenges. Often the difference in feeling overwhelmed is how we react to it (e.g. see [1]). If you see stress as something unfixable that you have no control over it is likely to make things worse. Most of the time, however, the cause of stress can be addressed either by changing our mindset or by changing something practical.

For example, if you are stressed about a problem in work that seems huge and important try stepping outside of yourself and asking if, in the grand scheme of things, it really is that important. If the answer is no then you can keep working on it but tell yourself that you can only do as much as you can do. If the answer is, yes it is important, map out a series of small steps that you need to take to challenge the problem and take them one at a time to prevent becoming overwhelmed.

This is where talking to colleagues can help. Research has shown that social support can buffer stress [2]. The more social support people feel when faced with a stressful challenge, the less likely they are to feel the strain. However a second study found an interesting addendum to this. Social support from colleagues is more important for reducing stress-related exhaustion than social support from external people [3]. This may be because colleagues can offer practical support in dealing with a stressful workload. While family and friends can be supportive they can’t offer aid in the same way that colleagues can.

This suggests that it is not just talking about stress that helps but talking about stress with the aim to tackling the underlying cause. For example, can you request more assistance from your supervisor or colleagues on a problem? Can you suggest changes to administration structures that would free up time? Has anyone else previously faced and surmounted the challenge you have been set and can they offer any tips?

Sometimes we get so caught up in our own work that we forget about the colleagues around us that are going through the same thing. Social support and friendship in work helps not only tackle stress but also increases job satisfaction, job involvement and even productivity [4]. So the next time you’re feeling stressed about work try to take back some control, take a break with a colleague and try sharing a problem to find a solution.

1. Robertson, I.H., The Stress Test: how pressure can make you stronger and sharper. 2016:# Bloomsbury Publishing.

2. Viswesvaran, C., J.I. Sanchez, and J. Fisher, The role of social support in the process of work stress: A meta-analysis. Journal of vocational behavior, 1999. 54(2): p. 314-334.

3. Halbesleben, J.R., Sources of social support and burnout: a meta-analytic test of the conservation of resources model. Journal of applied Psychology, 2006. 91(5): p. 1134.

4. Riordan, C.M. and R.W. Griffeth, The opportunity for friendship in the workplace: An underexplored construct. Journal of business and psychology, 1995. 10(2): p. 141-154.

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